Friends Father Died

My best friend in high school's father died a few weeks ago. We aren't that close anymore, but I couldn't imagine high school without her and our friendship. I'm sending a card to her family, I can't make the "Rememberance Service" so it's the next best thing I think. But what do I say?

Dear Scary Old BMW Shuttle Guy,
I know you're old and this shuttle job isn't your dream job. I know you probably do it just to keep yourself busy and keep out of your wife's hair for a few hours a day. But really... you were going 60 on the freeway. This is California, people go 80 on the freeway on average. We were getting passed, while getting dirty looks, on both sides. But that's not all. It was the picking of your nail. No, not even that. It was the looking down and picking at your nail. Really eyes on the road PLEASE! Last, but not least the coughing. I know at times it's uncontrollable and I do thank you for rolling down the window to cough out it, but it was the swerve the car did when you went to turn your head. My life flashed before my eyes.
I hope you made it home safe,
Aundra

Desisions... you've just got to live with them

Lets go back in time a bit here. Not too far, maybe Feb. of 2006. I know, i'm not truly streching the bounds of my time machien. I got all dressed up in my suit, the one my sister-in-law helped me pick out, and my pointy shoes to go to a job fair. I filled out several applications and shmoozed with a few princpals and supper attendents. I saw that MDUSD (that's Mt. Diable Unified School District) was doing interviews. This is one of the biggest districts in the east bay. They have schools that are about to go under with only 2 kinds in a class who speak English to schools that are the highest ranking in the state. I said... fuck it I'll interview... even if I don't want to work for them (they are also known for pink slipping their teachers until they know how many they can hire back next year... lame). I interview. I don't give a shit. I have fun. I talk and charm (i know I didn't know I could charm either). I leave the interview. I talk to one other district and start to leave the job fair, I had to ride. As i'm leaving, on the phone up dating people about the fair, I hear my name. I turn around and it's one of the principals who interviewed me. "We want you to meet with the supper attendent!" she gasped at me. Sure, why not. I meet. The S.A. interviews me again. Then she hands me a paper. "This says you'll come work for us in Augest." I said I'd think about it. I passed. I wasn't ready to commit in Feb for a job in Aug.
Okay lets skip a head>>>>
Aug. I've interviewed for several other schools. Just as a note not for the schools I worked my ass off for the past school year. No, the four or five openings they had... no I wasn't good enough. Oh, but I can get stompped on for three months. ANYWAY, it's Aug. and I have no teaching job in site. I was offered, and took, a personal assisting job for a women I use to babysit for.
Present Day>>>>
I substitute on average one day a week. I turn down, on average, one sub job a week. I tutor four days a week for 1 1/2 to 3 hours a day. I get my kid time. I get my teaching time... or at least that's what I say to myself. I was offered a long term sub job at the same school I work at last year that would have gone from March to the end of the school year. But I'm able to go to yoga and work out and ride and have lunch with friends. I'm able to take time off to go to horse shows and snowboard.
In February I made a decision. I chose two in the bush... and I am where I am? I'm not complaining or whining or bitching. I've got a good thing going on and I won't deny it. At times I miss the classroom, but I sub all day on Friday for the first time this school year.... we'll see if I still miss the classroom.

Thanksgiving

Hope everyone had a great thanksgiving. Mine was spent up at Tahoe enjoying some of the COLDEST weather I've felt all year... well besides mornings in my unheated bedroom. It was a good time had by all. The whole pumpkin pie was eaten as well as a whole apple pie (not all on Thanksgiving Day, just before we left Tahoe). I think it was just the right amount of time to spend with family. I think I only snapped like a teenage girl at my mom once near the end and over the whole four days, rolled my eyes at my dad less than a dozen.

Here is Abbie playing with my necklace. Yes it was just the fam, but we still try to look good.

And of course the turkey. Abbie loves meat! (eww perverts she's way too young! one word illegal!)

Pet Peeves

I HATE HATE HATE when people say they are going to do something... then don't. Whether it's call, e-mail, show up, whatever. If you say, "I'll give you a call around 7am tomorrow." Guess what?! I'm going to expect you to call me. You say, "I'll be there at 8." I expect you to be there sometime around 8 (I give 15 min windows... but I'll still give you shit 'cause I was probibly there at ten till). If you say, "I'll bring the cookies." Yeah that's right I expect mother fucking cookies. I'm not sure what this says about me, but I'm a strong beliver of, I guess, following though on your word.

I was told this was better

This is my injury.

I know not the best picture but hell. I was the least injured out of everyone, and if I'm able to walk out of a car that looked that that A4 with this as my biggest physical issue than I'll take that.

Pondering

I have a memory of my Uncle and his then wife talking to me about marriage. This is the story I was told.
They went to have the "pre-wedding" talk with the priest. He looked at this newly engaged couple and asked them one question. It wasn't Do you love each other? or What are you dreams? It was "How do you squeeze your toothpaste? The middle or do you roll it down?" My uncle and soon to be bride looked at each other... I'm sure a phrase like WTF went though their minds. "We've lived with each other for years and that's never been a problem." This lead me to believe they both squeezed differently. They were married and had three boys. After 20 some odd years of marriage they went though the most bitter, messy, painful divorce I've known any people to have.
How do you squeeze your toothpaste?

The Track Event

This weekend I had an Audi event up at Sears Point raceway. I had two students, a B student (who doesn't have track time 'til the afternoon of the first day [I never got to have her as a student... it will make sence soon]) and a D student. Students drive the car while instructors are in the passanger side giving directions. My D students had been on this track five other times and has done several Auto-X events. The D-students did one run group early in the morning. It was raining and my students car liked to jump around. He was doing a great job of keeping it under control. Second run group, a little less wet but not by much. Second lap my student looses traction around turn four. That wasn't the problem. He got it back just in time to lose it again in the kink that is turn five. The back of the car stepped out and snap (meaning lost traction) we went sliding to the left edge of the track. Shit... you don't go into mud sideways. Two wheels could sink and the rest of the car could keep going. Roll over roll. THat wasn't what happened... What did was a freak coinsidence... I look up and there about 30ft away in out line of slide is a black car, sitting still, no moving. We keep sliding... they don't move... their passanger side tail light meets the center of the driver side of the car... at 35 to 40 mph

The driverside seat air bag went off. I have a distinct imprint in my memory of my student breathing in and out the powder that fills the air when the airbag went off. My student, in the driver side of this car, has one cracked rib and two brused ribs. I, in the passanger seat of this car, have a severly brused elbow, bruse from the seatbelt and a sore neck. The other car that left that nice bumer/tail light imprint on the back door there... well the passanger/instructor has a severly brused shoulder and some whip lash. The driver of the other car wasn't that lucky. He was leaning over to start his car (it stalled when he went off the track). When we rearended his car he had the farthest to travel. He couldn't move his arms. He got Hella Flight out of there... to John Muir in Walnut Creek. As of last night, his family was flying up from LA to be with him and he was able to move his legs and move his fingers.
DON'T LIFT IN THE CORNERS!!!!!!!!!!! That's what I have to say about that. Both me and the instructor in the other car got back out on the track to drive... our students weren't so lucky. Two totalled cars.

LA

Okay, so I'm not into writing right now but I feel like my weekend needs an update. Apple Jacks came down, we spent 60 hours together and could not only stand being around him afterwards but also... lo-and-be-hold... wanted to keep hanging out with him. Anyway, he met my brother, Tao, the artist. Came to a furniture/gallary opening that showed his stuff, as well as LOTS of other people's stuff. He saw me ride, and hung out at a horseshow for two days and still he wanted to hang out with me... amazing. I didn't ride steller but rode fine. No big issues or mistakes, or booboos in the ring. I meet one of his friends and that was great. She was nice and funny and also came to see Tao's work.
All in all, not a bad weekend.
What's in the works this week... a track event at Sears Point.

Las Vegas

For once what happened in Vegas isn't going to stay in Vegas basically because it wasn't a Vegas "vacation" for me. Hell, I didn't even make it to the strip. I was at a horse show. It was busyness as usual for me. The two days I wasn't mentally there. I think I was caught up with some shit that went down back at home. But today, Sunday, when it counted I pulled it together. I rode. That's not to say I wasn't riding great all weekend (I got third on Friday) but Sunday, rather than feeling like I was sitting there like a well trained monkey, I rode. Out of 22 horses only 7 went clean the first round. Out of those seven only three went double clean... I was not one of them. I was, as always, the fastest four faulter. One rail. Four seconds faster than the winning combination but still in fourth place. That's okay, next week it's off to LA (Apple Jacks is coming down to watch, though I don't know if he knows what he's in for. {I read on the plane today that most people wait 3-6 months to ask their significant other to Thanksgiving dinner...}) and it's a whole new week anything can happen.

Halloween

This Halloween I got to spend a bit of time with AIA and the folks. I keep wondering what we did a bit more than two years ago before Abbie... life must have been boring. But anyway, I don't have any pics of my gogo out fit but my dad did call me Barbie if that means anything... I'm not sure it does. Well, i limited myself of pics but these I had to share."swick-o-sweat"

Only in Berkely do you get Organic cookies, a toothbruch, tooth paste and M&M's

But her favorite were the sweat tarts. Mmmm kitty loves sour!

Fall Back

This weekend was not only the time change for me, well for all really except Arizona sometimes, but I also did a lot of "falling back" off the sides of mountians at Yosemite. Apple Jacks, me and 20+ other of his friend's friends' friends spent the weekend up in California's greatest National Park.

As much as I wish this was a picture of me, I didn't bring and don't own a digital camera so..., but this gives you an idea of what I was doing. Just an idea.

Anywas, it was fun. The loads of people were a bit hard to handle. The fact Apple Jacks fell asleep at 8pm durring the Pot Luck dinner with all these people i didn't know around me and left me to survive wasn't to bad. (It was his grumpy, i feel sick, pre coffee pissyness that truly was annoying.) I did some great climbs. The longest climb I've ever done at 60 meters. It was a great climb with a great view of a medow and the opposite side wall of the valley. And dispite my nerviousness about being around 20+ strangers (I knew six of them before I came) it wasn't that bad. Nature is a beautiful thing.

New Addition To The Side Bar

Okay Okay so after some technical difficulties I think it's fixed. Enjoy!

Disney has ruined many a generation

It's 7:56am and I'm laying in bed totally not wanting to get up when I hear "rrrrvvvooom" going down the road near my house. You know what I hate? I hate that there is a part of me that hopes that thinks this is Apple Jacks on his motorcycle coming to say good morning, coming to surprise me 'cause we didn't have a chance to talk last night. Is this possible? Not really. a) his motorcycle is not 100% put back together. b) he should be either in a train or a car on his way to work c) my house is in NO way shape of form on the way to his work.
Why am I like this? I can only think of one thing that has perpetually made these dreams of being put on a pedestal, being made to feel like a princess, on one thing... Disney. Years of Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Little Mermaid, even Robin Hood telling me that my prince will come and sweep me off my feet. He will be cute and charming and bring me little thoughtful gifts for no reason. He'll chase down every women in the kingdom to try on a shoe just 'cause we dance all night. He will charge though a forest of thicket and slay a dragon. He'll battle the witch of vanity to save me. He'll fall in love with my song and still fall in love with my voiceless charm and beauty. He'll battle my evil uncle to right the wrongs of the world.
These are my example of love, of romance. At times do they make me want to puke? Yes. But at others I want a guy who will sleep on my parents porch to see me first thing in the morning 'cause he couldn't wait (My father for my mom.)
I know life is never a movie. I know life is never perfect. I know these are dreams. I just hate that they are dreams. I hate their impossibility, they non reality.

Willy

My mother adopted/resuced a Fox Terrier. He's a bundle of energy... pulled me along while I was running this morning. He'd look at me whenever I walked and be like "Hey, Why are you walking? Running is WAY more fun!" But anyway, here he is.

AIA vs Apple Jacks

That's right. I can't mention the meeting and not do a follow up. And yes Apple Jacks was late but he tried and you can only control traffic so much. It's just a lot to ask. A guy who normally doesn't get home 'til 8 to ask him to get home two hours earlier... that's a bit time difference. So, 20 min late, not to bad.
All in all it was great. Abbie made an effort to be comfortable with him, which is saying a lot for a two year old. He talked a bunch with Ian about cars and other stuff that I partially zoned out for. He talk with both Ian and Amy about Syracuse (yes I did have to look up how to spell it and yes they all went to the same college). I totally zoned out for that, something about crazy squirrels and dorms and different restaurants. I wanted to interject about the squirrel that got shaved at Lewis and Clark but I couldn't get a word it. That and Abbie was way more entertaining than the conversation about a dark, cold, gray place I've been to once.
At one point Apple Jacks tickled Abbie's feet and it made me smile. The cutest thing was when she walked off to bed and said "Night Night Apple Jacks." (No she did not say Apple Jacks but I'm still not ready for his name to go, though most people who read this know who he is... but it's way more fun to call him Apple Jacks.)
All in all it was good. I got the call the next morning for the AIA update/approval of Mr. Apple Jacks. And that I will keep to myself. That's mine at the moment. If you need to know I'm sure I'll tell you soon but in all everyone can know it was great food, decent wine, and good conversation.

My weekend

This weekend I was up in Sac for a "local" horse show. After showing in Canada and doing some hard shows in the LA area I just don't quite have the same respect for my smaller shows any more. Anyway, enough of my snobbery, I'll keep it simple for everyone and just say. I did well over all. Not stellar, but not to shabby. I think I might have won enough money to pay for most of the show costs.
On another note. Apple Jacks. Yes, things are still good. I would have liked for him to come to the horse show but he was up in Seattle for work and to hang out with some friends. He had one realization while gone that he told me about that I feel is blog worthy. That is, it's hard to have friends who live far away. (No Shit... Try your three closest friends living far away!) I think, or hope at least, that he has a new grasp on what my friendships with my three away girls is like. Who knows, he's a boy, I'll never understand what goes on in his head.
But Apple Jacks may be blessed with a new name and a character to go with it. That's right. Tony the Tiger. And no it has nothing to do with the fact that I think he's "GREEEAAATTTT" but it has to do with his flakiness. Not just flakiness, I mean I could have gone for special K with that was all, but his FROSTED flakiness. It has to do with the fact that in my life time, the 100,000's of flights I have taken, I have never totally utterly forgotten and missed my flight. That takes talent, and my boy has it. So for this entry he will be Tony. He will be my giant frosted flake. And one day, some day soon I hope 'cause we have dinner plans with the first family group, AIA, he'll be timely.

Oh My God SO CUTE!!!!

And People Say Cali Doesn't Have Seasons!

Willow Springs

This is a video of the tack I spend Monday and Tuesday going around and around.
Here a map of the track. The key hole on the upper left brings you up hill. Turn three goes up, four is flat, and five is down hill. The rest is flat. Turn four is the only turn that I wasn't floored coming out. It was an amazing track, fast. Exited turn 1 at 85, turn 2 at 90. I entered turn 8 at 100-105.

What was the best, and is always my favorite, part is the instructing. My student was great. He was a quick learner, had smooth hands, great at tracking out (the exit part of the turn). By his last run he was entering the fast turns at the same speed I was (he had more horse power [as most do out there] so was able to get up to speed out of the corners faster than I was) and being smooth, safe, and carrying that speed well. He didn't exit as fast as I did, but he was doing great.

What was also great was my former student from Button Willow who was back down again. He had a different instructor, which is good. He's chipped his S4 Avant, got tiers, and soon will get breaks. He was having a blast out there. It was great to see his use the basics I drilled into him the first time. Two rules: 1) You don't brake while turning or turn while you're still braking. 2) Whatever speed you enter a corner, that's the speed you picked, you can't lift and go slower or break or anything. That's the speed you picked, that's what you, at the very least have to maintain.

It was a good, long, exhausting, two days.