Thursday, March 16, 2006

Not Just gloatting

Okay, so I'm not just tooting my own horn... I'm just talking about my day.
So, today i was in a first grade classroom. I've been in this classroom once for half a day this week and once for a full day about three weeks ago. Now, I might work in Orinda, but that doesn't in any way make it easy. Yes, the first graders can read, can do math, are at state level but still. There are two kids who are special needs to the point they have their own aide and spend about two hours actually with the class. Not to tough right. Now there is one kid, a boy, defend and talkative. Constantly talking, not loud, but pulling everyone around him off topic. The three normal boys who really want to just talk, whistle, lean back in there chairs. That's four of the 20 kids who are talking... walking... ect. Now the girls, we have the two special needs. Two girls are GIRLS, pre-teen attitude but so sweet to your face. So, not the hardest class in the world, I've subbed some that are harder ones but NOT easy.
Well, it wasn't a HARD day but i was a bit of a hard ass on them when i needed to be but i always try to complement them when they are being great. Positive reinforcement is always better than negative.
Okay, fine I'll get to the point. Well, the classroom aide called me to tell me how happy she was with me as a sub. She continually praised me for how great it was to have me be there in the class. It was great, i was all red and so happy to be praised.
But there is a part of me that's like "Yes, I am a great teacher, WHY WON'T PEOPLE HIRE ME!!!" It's frustrating. Not to come across this way, but I know I'm a good teacher. I know it's my calling. I know it's what i should be doing, and i know I'm great. I also know that everyone who's been in the classroom with me, watched me teach all day has told me how proud they are of me, of how i teach, or how i work with the kids. Why can't i convey that in interviews? Why don't people see that, why do they see a young bubble girl? Ugh, okay I'm done but really.

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